NY/NJ trip

I had an awesome time on my last trip to the east coast. I arrived on Friday night and hung out with people in Bridgewater. It was so weird to be in an eating establishment until 4 in the morning. Go White Caste! The next day, I saw Harry Potter, and it was really good. I like the special effects and it's Harry Potter need I say more? Unfortunately, I have not been keeping up with the books, I still havn't read the 5 & 6th books. Afterwards, we realize we were running late, but I made it to NY in 45 minutes!

Saturday night was my bachelorette party. We went to a really yummy seafood Italian restarant and chowed down some good food. Then we went to the NY comedy club late, and they gave away our seats. We saw a side show, and it wasn't all that funny. After leaving early, we trekked around NY for some good bars. We went to Beauty Bar, Coyote Ugly, and finally ended up at Eugene's. It was crazy. I think the worst part was the taxi ride. I felt queezy on the ride back to the hotel and finally I had to throw up. Not a lot but just enough to make my throat feel yucky.

I took it easy Sunday. We went to an all-you-can-eat Japanese restaurant. Yummy food. I feel like a pig, but thank goodness I was coming down with a cold so it didn't seem like I am a fat pig. hehe.

Monday night was the U2 concert. It was a wonderful way to end my trip. U2 concert can never go wrong. I liked everything about it except the cold freezing rain outside.

I had a great weekend and I like my girlfriends!!

New Life

I have been super busy with my residency. Now I am working on the Antibiotic Assistance program at Theradoc. We just did our latest publication, take a look. It's pretty cool for physicians to use on rounds to determine what antibiotic to give. I helped test menningitis and surgical prophylaxis. I am working on intra-abdominal infection and that will be published in January. Check out the link:

http://www.merckmedicus.com/pp/us/hcp/frame_whitecoat.jsp?pg=www.merckmedicus.com%2Fpp%2Fus%2Fhcp%2Ftheradoc_home.jsp

Aside from working, I am still in school. The classes are just a blur for me since I don't really have time to study. I think I will take a break until I have more time in the future and get back to it. Now is just not the most optimal timing for another degree.

Well, as for my wedding plans... it's going. My dress-shopping experience has been disastreous. I found a dress pretty quick, but getting it fixed is like a pain. Now I know why marriage is one of the most stressful events in life, unfortunately divorce is rank lower than marriage. So one way of looking at it is that there is nowhere else to go but up once you get married. I have been so upset over the dress thing, I don't think I will help with anything else on the wedding. It's so frustrating, why don't people elope? It's a perfect good way to spend your hard earn money than waste it on a party that you may not enjoy in the end.

My residency class is ok. I never see them because I am always offsite, but at the same time, I realize I already have a life here at SLC and I am so busy even without them. At first I thought it will be cool to have a group to hang with, but now we hardly ever have time for them, unfortunately. Maybe if they all ski in the winter, it will be better, but until then, I guess I won't see too much of them.

An update on my fish. They are HUGE!! They must have grown 10 times since their original size. They are about 1.5 inches long and FAT. I don't know if they will grow anymore, but if they do, they will run out of hiding places in the fish tank.

Well, probably another update in another month or so. hehe

Update

Well since my last update, I lost 2 fish, but my other 4 are flourishing. They are about three times the size they were in the beginning. Probably bc I put them in the big tank and they have lots of room to grow.

I started my new job. It's a very disorganized program so I am starting to take charge. I am trying to find my own rotations and going on rounds. It's scary that I will be back to patient care, but I gotta start somewhere right?

I am reading the book Pillars of the Earth. It's very intersting. I can't decide if it's good or bad, but the part I read up to has a dad leaving his baby boy on top of his wife's grave because she died during child labor and he has no money to buy milk for him. How sad huh? I don't know if that would be my solution to the problem, but I am not living in the woods either.

6 new addition to the family

Over the weekend, I bought 6 little gold fish. They are not living with CoCo because CoCo isn’t very nice. They reside in a flower vase for now and when they get a little bigger and stronger – maybe CoCo will die or I will find a tank divider (they don’t sell it in Walmart). They are really cute, they get scared with the vibration of the table. But once they are comfortable, then they like to come to the top of the tank – mostly to look for food. I usually feed them twice a day with some snacks in between.

As I am getting ready for some time off next month, I am making some remodeling purchases. I got an awesome deal on my dishwasher. It’s a GE Profile and I got the floor sample for 50% off the discounted price --$350! It’s an awesome deal considering Home Depot sell the same thing for over $800, but the bad part is that I have to pay for delivery/installation and a warranty which added up to $150. It’s like almost half the cost of the machine. I also got a photo printer – so I can do the wedding invitation photos easier. (All this is to try to keep the cost down). I guess that’s all my major purchases unless I can find some good granite for my counter.

Delila and Sebastian

It has been a very sad last 48 hours for me. Over the weekend, I noticed my Delila’s right eye was bulging out and her scales were all dark. I thought of Shaker and how he had an infection like thing. I cleaned out the tank and separated them into two buckets. Delila being the sick one had her own and Sebastian and Coco shared the other. While cleaning, I broke the heater so the water was too cold for them to be back in the tank next morning. I went to Walmart early in the morning and set up the new heater. I went home for lunch and realized that it wasn’t plugged in. Irregardless, I saw Sebastian floating on the top while I was home cleaning and waiting for the water because I was going to dump them in within the hour of heating. I thought it was weird that Sebastian was fine, but died while I was home. So I just dump Delila in by herself because I figure she is sick and she can get use to the water by herself. By the time I got home, her eye was much better so I figure it is because I treated the water and she is healing. I dump Coco back in and left them alone. This morning I work up, and Coco was sucking on Delila and she is all white. Now I understood why Sebastian died – Coco was the culprit all along, that was why the other two had scars and Coco didn’t have any. I didn’t see the signs because he was always good when I am around. Every time I checked on him, he was sucking the glass and being good. Now I lost two fish and I don’t want him anymore, but I don’t want to kill him.

Another twist

A lot has happened since my last post. Everyone on my committee finally signed off on my thesis. I passed my comprehensive exam yesterday, and I got accepted into the Master of Medical Informatics program at the University. Apparently they rejected me the first time because I was really late on my application, but when the faculty met, they unanimously agreed to accept me. What does that mean? Anyhow, I guess it doesn’t really change anything since I was going to take a class anyway.

I finished reading Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini. It’s an excellent book that detailed a boy growing up in Afghanistan and how his life is changed by his “servant” and best friend. It’s interesting how much guilt a person can hold onto throughout his life. He always felt like an inadequate son, but in the end he understood life so much more because of it. Anyhow, it’s a good book.

Growing up -------- or not...

Life has been pretty busy around here, but I finally did decide on a job. I will do a residency next year here at the University of Utah hospital. Most of my responsibility will be rounding during the day and working on research in Medical Informatics with TheraDoc (a company around here). I will probably take 1 class each semester from Medical Informatics along with my workload. I got rejected from the Master of Informatics program here, sadly. I will also be a faculty --- It’s funny, I am actually on the website. I typed my name in google just to see what pops up about me, and there were a lot of stuff that I didn’t know about me. Pretty cool huh?

I also think I will cut down my workload a little. I think my outside consulting is taking up too much of my time. I think I will reprioritize some stuff so Peter can be closer to the top. So far, it’s been Saturday for my skiing/tennis/running and going out with people, and Sunday is for work/consulting/school. Oh, one cool note, I actually have a contract with the State of Utah Dept of Health for the consulting work. It’s pretty cool. One more thing I can add to my CV. I don’t have any government section on my CV. I wonder if they will give me anything else to do with this project once I am done with my part at the end of the month. I think it will help me build a career in FDA in the future. Anyhow, after my trip to Europe, I will stop consulting for most people, well maybe DOH just for my CV. I guess in the end, all the other consulting stuff doesn’t really build my CV that much.

I guess if I put family up more on my priority list, I would have to start making good decisions on my career stuff. That way when we move I can still find a good job… rather than having many breaks. I also need to think long term plans like 401K and etc. Can you believe I don’t even have a penny saved away for the future? I am just banking on that my real job will have these retirement plans set up. How sad huh?

Grudge

My thesis is killing me – I can’t explain why the results are not going the way I want it. I can’t find enough fudge factors to change the assumptions and data to make it what I want. I am suppose to present the information tomorrow, but I am lost --- my job interview will go sucky now that I am resorting to just my charm.

Writer's block

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

I am totally having a writer’s block on my stupid thesis. I can’t seem to get a discussion going... because the results are screwy. Talk about disappointments.

As luck would have it, I also had to deal with a leak in my pipes. Thank goodness that it’s my neighbor’s pipes that are leaking. He turns out to be a contractor and will paint my ceiling this week. I am stripping the wallpaper and painting my bathroom this weekend.

I am also committed to work on couple consulting stuff. It’s totally crazy – just the amount of work and time – also lack of direction from the other end. I am sort of making up stuff for a story for… me! I guess if I am a convincing writer, my story will be their story.

The upside of it all is that I am sort of seeing the end of the tunnel. Once I am done, I can move on to bigger and better places – Europe! I think it’s time for me to go across the ocean. Obviously my boredom has not been resolved with moving across the continent. Although, I think it is definitely a worthwhile experience while you are young.

Since my Mommy instincts will probably kick in soon and before you know it, I will have a little one running around. I actually bought some new decoration baby’s room. It’s a hot air balloon cross stitch. It goes perfectly with the bunny family I did years ago. We will definitely have to add some shelving when the baby is here tho so she can have some places for her own decorations / toys.

To work or not to work?

I can’t believe it’s already March! I feel so behind on everything. I am trying to finish my thesis which is becoming so confusing. Nothing I do seem to be “right.” I feel like I am going with what my advisor says to do which does not align with my instincts. I feel he just has his own view and what the results are sort “fitting” the model. My hypothesis does not seem to fit the model the way it is, but I feel it’s better to leave it the way it is rather than transforming the data. I am not oppose to transforming if it give me a more logical result, but there are just so many problems.

1. The relationship I find is opposite to my hypothesis, where as leaving it normal gives me at least the right direction, if it is not the same magnitude as I imagined.
2. The model explains less variance than leaving it normal.
3. Interpretation just gets annoying – how do you tell a managed care that you save 13% when it’s easier to tell them they save $13.
4. If the other diagnostics is not better for the transformation, why not leave it alone?

I am aware that most of you have no idea what I am talking about, but the thing is – I am just trying to get a publication!! Why is it so hard?

I am also in the midst of getting a job. I am contemplating between learning and working at a real job. The VA here is sort of offering me a fellowship – to work with people that I believe will be famous in the field soon. I believe they are the rising golden children of epidemiology, infectious disease, and informatics. Plus I can continue to work and build relationship with Dept of Health in Utah. Then there is this other job where I can work on Medicare Part D for a PBM. They are both in line with health policy and what I want to do. The first job will give me ties to the Feds, and the second job will give me experience in the policy side for private sector.

The pay differential will be a lot too. The government job will pay about $40K with possibility of me supplementing my income with consulting or working in the pharmacy. The other job will probably pay me $90K +, but I will not have as much ties with the public. The good side is that I can live more comfortable and save up for the wedding if I take the better paying job. However, I feel that I may not have much of a career growth. Granted I will be taking a chance on the VA too because I am assuming that they will make it big and I will have a solid foundation with them. Also to add to the equation is that it’s a government job, I will get a lot of “unseen” benefits such as better 401K, healthcare, fringe benefits from the government and oh yeah, if I get pregnant, I probably get longer breaks. I guess it really comes down to comfort for now or later because the reality is, unless I live until I am old, I can’t see my 401K savings. Both jobs are in the air still. They sort of fell into my lap and people are working to create position or make it happen. That doesn’t mean too much if the economy goes sour or etc.

The last part is the wedding… to have or not to have. Personally, I think it’s dumb to have a wedding because:

1. Too much time and too much hassle.
2. Too much money, where I can use the money for my condo, travel around the world, or do other stuff with.
3. Too formal when I just want to have fun with people
4. Which pastor, priest, or any religious person would want to marry us when we don’t even go to church regularly – even NOW (he is supposedly Christian)
5. Everyone is too scattered, I hate to miss people out but at the same time I am not patient enough to accommodate everyone
6. Everyone wants to be part of something!!

Yes, I love to list things. I am just not sure what to do about that. I guess if we don’t a wedding then I won’t need the money then I can pick the job options based on the jobs. I guess I am leaning towards VA, but I feel bad that I won’t be able to help us have a better life in the next couple of years. Is this what growing up is all about?

Engagement

I got engaged!!

I couldn’t believe it – Peter surprised me on Saturday by planning a trip to Vegas. First, he tricked me into thinking we are having lunch with his friend’s family. We were on a rush because we had to buy his little boy a birthday present. Instead of stopping by the mall, he drove all the way to the airport (I live only 15 minutes away). At first I thought we were going to Disneyland, after all, it is the happiest place on Earth, but instead we ended up in Las Vegas.

We had dinner and he got sick. So he ended up going to the bathroom while I had $5 for the slot machine. After my first game on the Harley Davidson nickel machine, I won $40!! Of course, I cashed out because I will never win again. Then we used that money to go on the Eiffel Tower. Then he asked me if I loved him and then he proposed to me!! He put the ring on a necklace we bought together during the day. (unfortunately, I was so excited about my ring that we lost the necklace).

Then we did it again on the Gondola at Venetian hotel. It was so nice because they sang to us. Anyhow, this is the most memorable Valentine’s weekend.

~* *~ Happy Chinese New Year ~ * * ~

~* *~ Happy Chinese New Year ~ * * ~

I went to this Chinese Celebration for Utahns. It was a very sad experience for me. The special speaker was the Utah governor, who adopted a Chinese daughter and spoke Chinese. It was really interesting to see that. The weird part was that during the 3 hours, more than half of the performances were Western with few Chinese traditions. I know I am not exactly a true FOB and I integrated well into the American culture, but I think I am still well verse in Chinese and know some basic traditions. As I was watching the show, I realized my kids would be shafted from Chinese culture. It’s weird that Chinese has centuries of culture, but there are few opportunity to see them. It would be horrible if my kids can’t speak Chinese, doesn’t know anything about its culture, and just be lost. Another weird thing is, there are a lot of mixed children in Utah, and majority of them do not learn Chinese. That is true for 100% Chinese kids, but the govenor’s child seemed to be more curious of the Chinese culture than Chinese kids with Chinese parents. What would happen to our kids?

Because of that, I decided that I wanted to make a Chinese New Year’s dinner. I was going to make the turnip cake – but once I realize that steaming takes ~1.5 hours. I have to give it up for tonight. I guess going out to eat would be much more realistic. Anyhow, who knows, maybe my kids would never be interested in Chinese and I would be too tired to teach them Chinese and that would be the end of Chinese line for my family.

collective soul

Last night I went to see Collective Soul in an outdoor concert at Park City. It was really neat. It is the best free concert I have ever seen. It was a little chilly but the music was good. Plus beer warm you up a little. Afterwards, we went to Spur which is a restaurant/bar, but they played country last night. Not really my cup of tea, but it was good company anyhow.

Before the concert, I went to this Regression class and they taught these new techniques which are very helpful for my present study. Now my R2 is twice as big as before. R2 tells you how much your model is explaining the situation. I am all excited ~ maybe with more work it will even be better. I am not fishing, but it was just a better technique to transform data.

Hawaii

This month has been pretty blend. After Christmas, there just isn’t that much going on – New Year’s Day is intended to keep the festive going, but nothing really to look forward to after that. I went to Hawaii in mid-Jan. It was nice and relaxing after a busy month. We went on hikes to see the waterfalls around Maui, sunrise on the top of the volcano, whale watching, snorkeling, and shopping around the towns. We also went on all those time share stuff. Can you imagine – a person may potentially own several properties base on the number of time shares you own. I already own two properties (my condo and my vacation club thing). It’s so weird, and these days, if you don’t start buying these time share soon – where would we go on vacations in the future? For example, majority of the hotels in Maui have been or are in the process of being converted to luxury condos for time share. If this continue to happen – we would have no hotels left and be forced to rent from someone or buy an outrageous time share.

I also went snorkeling. It was really fun, but I realize I get seasick pretty easily. Every time we went on a boat, I got all nauseated. I didn’t throw up or anything, but it was just pathetic. Since I was like the only one that needed to wear a life jacket and stuff – I decided to try to learn to swim again from the U. My first class was interesting. First there were only three girls in the class. One white guy and the rest are all Indians. I guess Indians don’t learn to swim while they are young either. I thought that was really odd, most the classes I took at Rutgers were filled with girls.